This Southern Belle's Musings

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Monday, January 17, 2005

What Is Friendship? 

I don't consider my reactions to recent events as over-reacting or, as my s.o. likes to refer to it, me trying to assign my morals, ethics and expectations on others.     I merely file it in the "common-courtesy" category, but you are certainly welcome to come to your own conclusions, as I certainly don't want to attempt to tell you how or what to think.

We recently visited with friends for the evening and I made a comment . . . very off-handedly and matter-of-factly . . . about a certain situation to the woman, and I was side-swiped by a comment back from her that raised a question of my heritage, parentage, lineage, and any other "-age" you may want to insert here.     Now, before anyone says I'm over-reacting, let me further add that this isn't the first time that . . . well, . . . I would classify things she has said as being snide, somewhat rude, comments . . . albeit in what appeared to be a feeble attempt at a joking manner.     I don't know if she is just lacking in some social courtesies, or if she is just somewhat passive-aggressive in her behavior.     I was taken aback and merely looked at her in disbelief that she would even say something of such a nature to me.

In another relationhip . . . one that I really should distance myself from for my own self-preservation . . . I keep allowing myself to be pulled into this woman's melodramas.     Furthermore, on the telephone and in person, I continue to allow her to dominate the conversations -- even to the point of interrupting me in mid-sentence (how rude!) to rattle off something completely off-topic of the conversation at hand, all due to some false sense of family loyalty that I possess.     I have bent-over-backwards for this woman -- emotionally, monetarily, time-wise -- and without ever a thank-you or any type of reciprocative show of friendship or family loyalty (or payback of the money she still owes me).     I understand that she is self-centered and egocentric; I guess I just expect her to one day miraculously change.

To be quite honest, I have better luck with those that I (personally) choose as my friends (rather than the family that I was stuck with -- with the exception of my parents; they are fantastic! -- or the friends that happen to be "joint" friends of my s.o. and myself)     I want to say that I'm extremely thankful for my best friends Vic (who needs to update her blog - *hint,hint*) and Brian, my literary colleague and secret-sharing friend Patricia, my MIA friend Marshall, and my new cyber-friend/phone buddy GreyBiker.     These are people that I believe would drop whatever they were doing if I called, and help me out in a moment's notice.     These are the kind of friends I prefer to surround myself with -- and, I'm lucky to have these five in my life!

Category::   Relationships

(c)   2005    A Southern Belle's Life

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Susan Reno-Gilliland, known as "Miss Kitty," an Irish lass, a true Southern Belle; a writer, photographer, animal-lover, dreamer, stargazer, totally tangled (or is that entangled?) in relationships, slightly obsessive iNFp with stories to tell!    . . . (fascinated by forensics, human behavior, pushing all the right buttons of men I find interesting, and seeking utterly-sweet revenge without any repercussions.)     I am a Friday's Child.    Friday's Child is loving & giving.
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